You Couldn’t Save Me

Tape 6: Side A – Clay Jensen

Come on down and meet your maker… come on down and take a stand! This entry will possibly be the longest entry of the tapes because there is SOOOOOOOOO much to talk about. We’re finally at the point of the story that has been built upon since the beginning, what do I mean? Even though this series is about the life of Hannah Baker and her slow descent into madness until she commits suicide….low-key this series is also about a kid named Clay Jensen who out of the blue one day got forced upon an emotional journey of revealing dark truths and self discovery.  If you look back on it the entire book and all of season 1 is all about Clay listening to Hannah’s tapes and witnessing: his reactions, thought processes and growth as a person because of Hannah’s tragedy. Also Clay’s purpose among all of the fuckery is to be the “light” to counterbalance all of the “darkness” in this story… can good guy Clay save the day? Let’s talk about Clay’s tape.

To sum up Clay’s tape: before the events of the last 3 tapes Clay Jensen decides to go to Jessica’s party at her house with Hannah deciding to go as well ONLY because Clay was going. Up to this point Clay and Hannah have been close but both have been scared to take it to the next level. So at the party Hannah and Clay mainly stay close together and talked while avoiding a drunk Jessica and Justin. Wanting more privacy to talk some more Clay and Hannah go up stairs into Jessica’s bedroom. Eventually their talking turned into heavy making out and was leading into possible sex. As they were kissing Hannah all of a sudden started to have flashbacks in her head of all of the people on the tapes that has fucked her over and mentally damaged her causing her to freak out. Out of deep fear that her bad luck would rub off on Clay as well as not wanting her “bad” reputation to destroy Clay’s good guy reputation Hannah puts her clothes on and repeatedly screamed at Clay to leave. Clay eventually leaves leaving Hannah crying and depressed as she slides next to the bed hidden, that is when a drunk Jessica and Justin enters the room…. And you know the rest.

First of all let’s break down the man known as Clay Jensen. Clay is portrayed as a student that borderlines being a awkward nerd that really doesn’t stand out and being friendly with the popular crowd that gets invited and goes to the occasion party. There is no bullshit with Clay, what you see is what you get. Clay is such a good guy that Hannah admits on the tapes that part of her attraction to Clay is that he wasn’t a scumbag like most others… that Clay actually earns his good guy status and wanted to know more. They also show that Clay and Hannah do share a lot of interest together which is why they always talk and get along so well. Clay applied and got a job at the town’s movie theater because Hannah worked there. Now of course Clay being awkward with females had a hard time telling Hannah how he felt about her and ironically Hannah had a hard time telling Clay her feelings about him… a real stalemate of love..

As Clay’s tape has been build up over the episodes and even having others taunt Clay with the line “YOU’RE NOT SO INNOCENT WAIT UNTIL YOU HEAR YOUR TAPE!” we find out that Clay did nothing wrong… in fact he’s the most innocent person on the tapes. Clay was a good guy before the creation of the tapes and he’s still a good guy after the tapes.Although Clay himself feels deep guilt due to the fact that he thinks had he stayed in the room and talked to her he could have saved Hannah and honestly he probably could…. But since Hannah decided to shut him out of her like “out of safety” it created a “what-if” scenario within Clay that will eat him alive inside for quite a while. I know Hannah meant well but Clay was the perfect person to open up to about all of her problems… but by that point in her life she was mentally too far gone and “self sacrificed” herself to push the one person she deeply loved out of the danger zone.

Now I will say there is one thing that really pisses me off about this tape: it pisses me off and truly baffles me on how a ton of people give their reviews and opinion of this show and don’t truly understand this tape. I keep hearing dumbasses say things like “Why is Clay on the tape he innocent?” and “Clay didn’t need to be on the tapes” and I’m here to tell you… you fucking didn’t get the point of this tape. First of all duh no shit Clay doesn’t deserve to be on the tapes and Hannah point blanks says it “Clay your name doesn’t deserve to be on the tapes but you need to be on here if I’m going to tell my story”. Hannah had to talk about Clay because he was the sole reason that she was at the party in the first place and being with Clay was the sole reason she was in Jessica’s room that lead to the other 3 tapes to ever happen… so if Hannah left off Clay from the tapes her story especially about the events that night would have been incomplete.

Which leads to the major secret of this tapes that damn near everyone doesn’t see for some reason…. THIS IS NOT “CLAY’S TAPE”… THIS IS ACTUALLY HANNAH’S TAPE! Yes this tape is actually Hannah’s Tape, up to this point every tape she dedicated to a person that did her wrong and/or fucked her over. So it shouldn’t be a surprised that a mentally damaged depressed Hannah blames herself for problems that’s happened to her and her subconscious made her create a tape about herself. Hannah blames herself for hurting Clay and pushing him away, Hannah blames herself for stopping the one thing that could have brought her true happiness ness away from her life, and hell if hindsight had Hannah not sent Clay away that room would have stayed locked and Jessica’s rape might not have happened as well as the car crash with Sheri that lead to the death of the high school senior. This is Hannah’s Tape because she blames herself for all of that.The Tapes are not all about calling people out… she used to the tapes to also apologized to Clay and to explain to him why that night went down the way it did because he was owed an explanation. Plus Hannah needed someone to pass the tapes to the next person on her behalf since… well because she’s dead.

Once Clay started to listen to the tapes he became very judgemental to all the other people on the tapes and try to get some street justice on some of the people and actually tried to help out others on the tape as well. While virtually every other person that listened to the tapes tried to forget about it and keep it on the low Clay couldn’t do that and I can’t blame him for that. Hearing an audio suicide note from the person you loved explaining all the hard and gruesome details on why she ended her life and how you couldn’t save her can mentally fuck your up. So it’s gonna be real interesting on how Clay moves on from all of this in season 2… that’s if he can more on or be haunted by the memories of his lost love for the rest of his life. Funny thing is that Clay and Hannah’s story was so compelling that after the first couple of views last year I written my raw opinions about it on this website. If you want to go back and read what I originally thought about this tape and compare it to this current entry click on the link below…

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